The one where I just post some notes from a call...

Cust is having problems connecting.
Cust advises that error message advises that modem can't detect dial tone.
Getting cust to check phone cable into modem, cust advises phone line is plugged in.

Asking cust if she can plug handset into phone line and check for dial tone.

Cust advises she has already done that and she doesn't have a dial tone.

Advising cust to speak to phone service provider.
Cust wants to know if there is anything we can do.

Advising customer we provide internet access.

Call ID Given
Call Closed

The one where you know it's going to be a long day...

1. When you read out the password a for alpha, l for lima, numeral zero, g for golf, z for zulu, w for whiskey, and the customer replies, zero as in the number?

2. You say to a customer... is everything on the page blank, there are no settings in the boxes right? and they say yes.. only to check it 15 minutes later and find out that there were settings, but because they were grayed out "it didn't count" as the customer advises you.

3. When you get a computer "technician"* who's job it is to install ADSL modems all day long ring up and ask you how to configure a connection for a a mac on ethernet.

*head desk*